I did a recent podcast on my locals channel where I discussed the first 12 months in daygame and also covered this topic as a guest speaker on James Tusk Warsaw bootcamp last week. You can listen to the podcast here. Without any doubt, the first 12 months in daygame is an electrifying, exciting and at times terrifying experience. I want to cover off some of the main points of advice here in summary form:

• Make friends with failure. Now this may sound very pessimistic and self-defeating - but it isn't. Perhaps failure can be softened with a friendlier phraseology of, make friends with rejection, challenge, 'no-thankyou' or any other softer permutation, but I prefer to call it for what it is. Failure, simply put, means we fail to obtain the girls number, her Instagram, we don't get to date her, or sleep with her. We will fail in the overwhelming majority of sets we do to succeed with any of the basic measures pf success I have just described. Become comfortable with this and build it into your mindset. Appreciate that rejection and failure are part of the daygame experience. Daygame, even for the best of us, has a 97% failure rate.
• Make friends with possibility: the flip side of this coin is the optimism and incredible journeys and vectors we can create for ourselves through the simple act of speaking to a girl on the street. The longer you stick at daygame and persevere through the challenges described above, the nearer you will come to success and generating some profound experiences, incredible dates, sex, and meaningful relationships - even love. This is why we adjust our mindset and smile at the failure and rejection, because it is outweighed by the moments of reward, however brief, transient or long-lasting.
• Chart your journey: don't reside in your head. Keep a weekly journal or a blog, put your inner thoughts and fears and sticking points onto paper or even a private online blog. Share with other like-minded men, or keep it to yourself. The act of diarising your experience is cathartic and fulfilling as well as educational. It is also nostalgic. Be prepared to want to reflect on your experiences - the good, the bad, the mundane.
• Work on yourself: become better, work on your physique and your fashion. Be bold and overhaul yourself. If you're overweight - then aggressively working on losing weight. Embolden your look with new styles. I am not saying become a peacock - I am simply saying that you should look to step outside of the box that you may have inadvertently placed yourself in. Take some advice on new styling - less is often more - neutral styling and try dressing to trends - necessary - for many younger women. They want to walk down the street with a man who is self-aware.
• Time is your depreciating asset: if you're older - and by this I mean in your late 30s to early 50s, consider coaching. Get some fast-track skills and level-up quickly. Don't blow your first 2000 sets on 'hope'. Get someone like me to coach you and set you on the right path early. Good coaching will iron-out the kinks and genuinely represent a good investment, especially if it is tailored to you and 1-1 coaching. I have seen it many times - guys get into daygame and salt away a couple of years with poor results before taking action - and they almost always regret their inaction.
• Don't use emotional crutches: use this first 12 months to build your character and get out there on your own. Face the harmless demons of approach anxiety and learn that you can do this without the emotional crutches of other guys to wing with or the most egregious form of childishness - rat packs sat outside bars on Saturdays doing snipe openings as they sup beer. Face the truth of who you are on your own. Go out on your own and take action for yourself. Build your mindset and tenacity on your own at least the first 6 months - it will coalesce and crystallise, forming a strong, confident veneer that will never be breached. Resilience is a critical mindset to develop - don't take shortcuts - face these early challenges on your own. Once you have developed some authenticity, resilience and strong mindset, then by all means look to get wings - but not before you have built yourself on the streets.

BroodingSea, August 2024